Wednesday, March 18, 2009

American Idolatry

So, does anyone still watch this garbage? I do. After taking a trial separation for Fantasia through Taylor, I came back around for Jordin, David, and now this season. It keeps getting worse and worse. I will say, there are a few winners this season, and by winners I mean the one 16 year-old girl from Cali that sings as good if not better than most people in the business today. Gone is the Later Day Saints drivel of David Archuletta and his overbearing father - arriving is the band of weirdos of Season 8. Let me recall what I can: 1 piano playing blind guy, 1 tatted up single mom hippie weirdo, 2 young moms from Memphis, 1 dueling piano bar player, the 16 yo fireball, 1 Mr. Niceguy from Arkansas, 1 oil riggin' family man, 1 gay theatre/emo kid from SF, 1 Indian college student from UNC, and 1 widower youth group leader. It's a rag tag group not seen since the Little Rascals, and that's just who's left. Our money is on the young one, Alison Iraheta, or Danny Gokey, the youth group leader, who is a combo of Michael McDonald fronting the Barenaked Ladies....

If anyone watched last night, you saw Johnny Cash roll over in his grave (or maybe felt it as the earth shifted underfoot). Adam Lambert, the former Wicked castmember and My Chemical Romance/Cure/Pet Wentz emo kid, took "Ring of Fire" to places I never imagined. With an Indian/Persian arrangement full of sitars etc, the June Carter penned tune was twisted into one of the scariest things I've ever seen. As flames filled the background, Lambert caressed the mic and himself while purring through the song channeling Grace Slick of Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit" and Jim Morrison with "The End" or "Spanish Caravan". Either way, terrifying and cocky. Basically, he said on Grand Old Opry night, I'm better that this - here goes! I would be no more shocked if I was being sung to by the hookah smoking caterpillar himself from Carroll's Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. Somebody's getting the axe tonight. I hope it's not Anoop (the Indian kid from UNC). In this time of Slumdog madness, how can you not pull for the kid? I want to say bye birdie to the rockin robin tatooed, horrible-quirky dancefest that is Megan Joy. Peace!

No shame in this game - I'm watching.
It's better than Dancing with the Stars any day!
Just watch this madness before it gets taken down
RING OF FIRE!
HERESY!

4 comments:

Courtney said...

Ditto on the Ring of Fire ... it was really just freaky and weird ... Johnny would not be proud! The guy can sing but that was just aweful!

A said...

does anyone else think queer-eye/emo Adam's face looks like Elvis??

Will said...

i always see liza minelli....

Anonymous said...

agree my brother, his rendition reminded me of Kate Beckinsdale's boyfriend on the movie Serendipity. the only difference is that Lambert is a real person and the movie role was a fictional character meant to be ridiculously obnoxious.